Just call me 'Clifford'.

Since I'm grounded until the end of this semester, it took me a while to convince Vicki to let me help out at the book-fair this Friday after school. Actually, it just took one minute of conversation on my part, and a few hours plus an entire night to "think about it". It wasn't really that hard, but I did lay it on pretty thick. I mean, I wasn't being cheesy-- I'm just reasonable and sincere. So, I'll be there Friday after school 'til... well, it closes at 8 o'clock, but I don't think I'll stay that late. I'll be helping set up, maybe run the registers, and Dr. Newbold said I may need to get inside of the 'Clifford Costume' (I don't really know what that's about, but hey, whatever helps people buy good books!) and go socialize with people. I think that would be fun. Hot, smelly, sweaty, maybe... but fun.
At least I hope it's enjoyable, because 1) I'm giving up my leisure time to do manual labor, willingly, and 2) other than church on Sunday mornings (ah, waking up early...), and school, that is all the social interaction I am recieving until finals are over. It's really not a huge deal that I'm grounded... it's just that I wanted to give blood this weekend, I won't be able to attend that concert (which I'm not even sure we were going to in the first place), and these next couple of homelesses will be the last I will have until after the New Year's. I told my counselor this yesterday and he said it was because I had a good heart, and I wanted to do things for people. That's why I was disappointed, because I was letting other people down. I just sighed and told him that's not why I said that, I wasn't trying to paint a picture like I'm this high and mighty person who is always giving their time to other people, because I'm not. It's just that I always do those two things. And he just persisted and said again, "because you have a good heart." I know I'm talking about him a lot, and I'm sorry. I don't know why, but ever since I've left that room, I've been thinking about the idea of having a counselor, and everything that was said in that room. Well-- regardless-- I am disappointed that I'm grounded.
Today has actually been okay, all things considered. I will tell you the good things about my day: I didn't get dragged out of my classroom to speak with my counselor. I just had a nice conversation with one of my favorite people. I completed two books today. I got a lot of school work done today (in my opinion). Tomorrow in two classes we are watching movies, so I'm happy. I am pretty sure I aced a U.S. History test today. I completed my last packet of Physical Science for night school, but I still have 12 more hours to put in... 12 hours he told me I can spend doing homework or just reading, and I am thrilled.
Then I can start my World History class. Normally no one shares the table with me, since there are just two chairs, and I put my feet in one. And usually it's empty enough to where people can be pretty spread out at night school, so I don't have to worry about keeping my feet off of the chair across from me. Well, I had my feet on them, and today this boy came over and tugged on it a little and so I muttered an apology and moved my feet. I thought "oh wow, it must be crowded, because no one sits here," but I looked up and there were empty tables everywhere. I've never seen him before, either. It was weird and slightly uncomfortable, but I guess that's life. He didn't really bother me too bad, so whatever.
Lately I have been noticing and making note of attributes and things that my ideal person would have. I'd love to meet someone and be good friends with someone who has all these attributes. But I hate myself for wishing I could meet someone like that, because I never will. And it unconsciously raises my expectations on my current friends, so I appreciate them less and less, which is an awful thing.
I feel very incoherent. I feel like I am rambling and I feel like I'm skipping from subject to subject. So I guess that's all.